Caught Red-Banded!

I'd always wondered why previews advertised their appropriateness for a "general audience." It's like the Gospel of Judas; you surmise such a thing must exist somewhere in the world. Then, senior year of high school, $8.00 shelled out for Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle confirmed my suspicions: Restricted trailers are real! A fierce maroon overtook the screen, and soon enough, I was thrust into two uncensored, possibly uncomfortable minutes of advertising.

Can't remember what film it promoted. The earliest mention I found of red-band trailers was for Reservoir Dogs, so they've been around the block. But the red-band craze expanded, seemingly overnight. Regal theaters, in March 2008, began showing them before select R-rated features, and demand remains high. Part of the excitement comes from seeing if the naughty content in the description (i.e. "sexual content and strong language") will grace the preview. And just think, when the expletives and deshabille surface, why, they could be the mere tip of the iceberg.

Let's take a look at recent red-bands, and if you get enough bang (literally) for your buck:

• The Hangover. And it delivers, from the first dialogue ("Why can't we remember a goddamn thing from last night?") on through the bareass Asian badass who assaults the dudes and toddler self-pleasuring. F-words in the trailer: 3.
• Funny People. One dirty joke, and the rest at surprisingly tasteful network TV standards ("I'm really good at Grand Theft Auto. Maybe I should start beating up hookers."). It ends with a swipe at IKEA, for goodness' sake. F-counter: 2.
• Forgetting Sarah Marshall. More of a narrative than the first two snippets-and-punchline approaches. We're treated to Jason Segel's derriere and several sexual positions. F-counter: 0.
• World's Greatest Dad. Opens with a haiku on menstrual cycles. Clearly marketing didn't want to give too much away, because the trailer evades the (very R-rated) device that revs the plot. This trailer is reminiscent of the Funny People one: a feel-good story with dirty words. Untrue here, but at least it's spoiler-conscious. F-counter: 4.

Looks like red-bands stick to frat-boy hijinks. And there's a perverse joy to the restricted trailer, especially because it can be better than the film itself. Will this be true of these upcoming movies?

• Legion. Low-key until psycho-granny goes full zombie, and the hyperviolence ignites. A man's chest boils up and tears apart. Hard to tell how serious we should take this film. F-counter: 2, granny-style.
• Zombieland. 7 zombies machine-gunned, 3 zombies run over, 2 zombies punched in mouth, 1 zombie whacked with banjo. I think it's a comedy. F-counter: 3.
• Hot Tub Time Machine. Apparently it's about a hot tub -- wait for it -- that acts as a time machine. F-counter: 3.
• I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell. The Mount Everest of depravity; how can there possibly be a "general" trailer? There is, though, and it's actually funnier: "I need this like I need Hepatitis C." F-counter: 5.